DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are in a quandary.
Our 12-year-old granddaughter had a giant celebration for her birthday. Her different grandparents gave her a selection of $100 or an in a single day keep at a resort with a pool. She selected the in a single day.
It has been a number of months now, with no resort keep scheduled. Her different grands dwell full, busy and chaotic lives. Our granddaughter informed me she feels damage, disillusioned and a bit indignant. We had a great discuss, and I really feel she now higher understands how adults typically neglect how shortly time passes.
Within the meantime, my husband and I want to slip a $100 invoice underneath her pillow and perhaps assuage her emotions towards her different grandparents. We have to know if that will be a clever factor to do or if we must always let it’s.
We perceive it isn’t our drawback, nevertheless it hurts our hearts to see her let down after patiently ready for her birthday current. What do you counsel?
— GRANDMA KNOWS BEST
DEAR GRANDMA: You might be pretty folks, and I perceive your impulse to cowl for the opposite grandparents. That stated, I don’t suppose you need to do it.
Your granddaughter is rightfully disillusioned, however she must study that typically of us don’t comply with by way of on their guarantees. If she does, it might come as much less of a jolt when she’s a bit of older.
DEAR ABBY: I’m having an issue with my sister, who visits me on the typical of as soon as a month.
She lives 4 hours away. Her buddy and her husband accompany her. They’re my solely firm. I used to get pleasure from them however now not.
After their visits, stuff is all the time lacking from my home — a hairbrush, my canine’s electrical nail file, random dishes and plates, rat traps, laundry detergent packets, greenback retailer craft objects, and many others.
Abby, I hid the detergent packets, however she discovered them, and I knew she took them. Once I confronted her, she angrily denied it and insisted I used to be accusing her of issues she by no means did and would by no means do. Once I informed her in regards to the beads, she stated she by no means noticed them and didn’t know what I used to be speaking about.
After that, I didn’t see her for about three months. We made up, and she or he did it once more!
Her husband is aware of. I set a entice for her buddy beforehand, and she or he didn’t steal something.
My sister was bringing her soiled laundry along with her to clean at my home to be able to save on her water and electrical invoice. I put a cease to that.
What can I do about her?
— DISAPPEARING ACT IN NEW MEXICO
DEAR DISAPPEARING ACT: Assuming that the buddy is within the clear, that leaves solely your sister. Has she all the time been light-fingered, or is her pilfering one thing latest? Whether it is latest, discuss along with her husband and inform him you might be frightened about her.
Counsel she be neurologically examined by her physician for indicators of dementia or another brain-related sickness. If she checks out, there may be one other situation known as kleptomania, by which victims can’t resist the urge to steal. It’s fixable provided that they’re prepared to confess there’s a drawback and resolve to do one thing about it.
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
