DEAR ABBY: I’ve been married for 52 years.
Whereas searching for a tax doc, I discovered a manila envelope that had a be aware written on the surface. It stated, “If something happens to me, please destroy this, because I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
I opened the envelope and located nude footage of my husband and one other lady taken 30 years in the past.
Once I confronted my husband, he stated it occurred a very long time in the past and it’s my fault for opening the envelope.
I by no means obtained an apology, and I now not need to be intimate with him. I would like recommendation on how you can get previous this.
— PHOTO-FINISHED IN GEORGIA
DEAR PHOTO-FINISHED: That your husband wouldn’t provide an apology solely provides insult to damage. What a idiot.
He left a “time bomb” and didn’t have sufficient frequent sense to contemplate what would occur if, after his dying, you or your kids sifted by way of his souvenirs.
Since you need to get previous this, it’s time to seek the advice of a licensed marriage and household therapist. In case your husband refuses to go together with you, go alone — or pray for amnesia.
DEAR ABBY: I used to be out to dinner this night. A father and his two sons (10 and 6) have been seated on the desk subsequent to ours.
As quickly as they sat down, the daddy started berating the 10-year-old’s efficiency at a sporting occasion. He referred to as him “worthless” and a “piece of dog sh-t.” It continued all through your complete meal.
I felt unhealthy for the boy and was horrified on the manner his father was treating him. I needed to take the daddy apart however didn’t know if it could make him abuse his son much more.
What recommendation do you could have for conditions like this?
— SITTING BY IN COLORADO
DEAR SITTING BY: It’s counterproductive when mother and father develop into overly concerned of their kids’s sports activities actions. Clearly, the general public shaming this father was giving the boy wasn’t useful encouragement.
That stated, you have been clever to stay silent for the explanation you acknowledged. When you had tried to intervene, it could have embarrassed the abuser, and it may need made issues worse for the boy.
DEAR ABBY: “Debbie” and I’ve identified one another for 15 years. Our kids grew up collectively, and we’ve got participated in numerous actions collectively. She helped me by way of a tough divorce and has all the time been there for me.
Debbie determined a few 12 months in the past that we may now not be mates resulting from our completely different political opinions. She despatched a textual content out of the blue saying it.
I used to be devastated. I’ve tried to contact her, however she has blocked my quantity.
In all of the years Debbie and I’ve identified one another, we by no means mentioned politics. Since she blocked my quantity, I’ve considered writing to her or dropping by her home to see if we are able to get previous this.
What do you suppose I ought to do, if something?
— LOST MY BEST FRIEND
DEAR LOST: I’m sorry to your loss. What I believe is that the subsequent transfer must be Debbie’s. What she did was merciless. Except you want to courtroom extra judgment and rejection, maintain your distance.
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
