DEAR MISS MANNERS: My boyfriend’s ex moved to our metropolis and requested to stick with us for every week whereas renovations have been being completed on her new condominium.
Whereas she was right here, I discovered damaged consuming glasses within the rubbish, twice, hidden below a paper towel. After the second time, I stated it wasn’t a giant deal, however requested if she might tell us they have been there so we wouldn’t by accident minimize ourselves.
She was offended and complained to my boyfriend, who stated it was impolite of me to say something.
May I’ve dealt with it higher?
GENTLE READER: You dealt with each the state of affairs and, fortunately, the rubbish, remarkably effectively. Breaking issues and hiding the proof just isn’t well mannered visitor habits.
Miss Manners hopes you’re taking some solace, nevertheless, on this lady making it apparent why she is your boyfriend’s ex. She’s going to depart it as much as you to determine if his calling you impolite and siding along with her is worthy of constructing him your ex, too.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I had an artwork present final summer time, the week earlier than my birthday.
An outdated pal stopped by and bought a really good glass platter (over $150) for her daughter. As she was paying for it, she informed me that this sale was my birthday reward.
I smiled and stated “thank you.” I didn’t actually know how you can react.
Then at Christmas, as I opened her reward, she informed me she’d adopted the identical course of: She purchased the merchandise from her sister, referred to as the sale a present, then gave the merchandise to me. I smiled and thanked her (and questioned what her sister thought).
It’s so odd to me. I’d reasonably not be given the reward of a sale.
I feel she feels that she’s supporting me and my artwork. It additionally is likely to be a means for her to chop again on spending, as she is giving two “gifts” for the value of 1.
It is likely to be time to cease giving presents. I’m simply unsure how you can inform her that her scheme doesn’t really feel like a present.
GENTLE READER: With the entire calls for and shenanigans related to trendy present-giving, Miss Manners is sort of inclined to agree with you. The act has all however misplaced its allure.
Chances are you’ll attempt saying, “How kind of you to take an interest in my artwork. But I would never want you to purchase something merely as a favor if you would not otherwise do so. In that case, I am happier to sell it to a stranger.”
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My brother’s grown little one is transitioning from feminine to male and is now referred to as Gary. I really like Gary and settle for his decisions.
My brother is having a tough time. Gary has a toddler who calls him “Mum.”
My query is: Once I introduce Gary to somebody, do I name him my nephew or my niece?
GENTLE READER: Why not ask Gary?
