Because the car approached the Tijuana border, Etelvina Lázaro’s son, sitting behind the wheel, requested her once more if she was positive.
“I’ve already made up my mind,” she recalled telling him in Spanish. “I’m leaving.”
Lázaro, a 54-year-old grandmother, had lived along with her household in San Diego for over 20 years. However after her husband, Margarito, was arrested by federal immigration brokers in mid-July after which deported, she made the exhausting determination to depart her grown youngsters and grandchildren behind and observe him to Mexico.
She is one in every of a number of undocumented immigrants who’ve determined to depart the nation on their very own amid President Donald Trump’s intensified efforts to crack down on unlawful immigration.
The federal authorities launched a course of in Could dubbed Venture Homecoming, urging undocumented immigrants to return to their native nations or face the implications. By means of the CBP Dwelling cellular app, eligible people can register for voluntary departure and obtain a $1,000 exit bonus, a flight residence and an exemption from fines for failure to depart.
“Leave on your own terms. Avoid the jail cell. Avoid the humiliation,” reads an Immigration and Customs Enforcement put up about “self-deportation” on the social media platform X.
A Division of Homeland Safety spokesperson mentioned Thursday that “tens of thousands” of undocumented immigrants have utilized the CBP Dwelling app however didn’t present a particular quantity.
But it surely’s unclear what number of, like Lázaro, have left quietly.
Etelvina Lázaro in her condominium for the final time on Oct. 2 in San Diego. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
Lázaro mentioned she was unaware of such a course of. As an alternative, she selected to depart on her personal. In a method, she mentioned, she remains to be damage by what occurred. Earlier this month, she had her son drive her to Tijuana, and from there, she flew to her hometown in Michoacán.
She left as a result of she needed to be along with her husband, quite than out of worry of being detained. She mentioned that worry went away once they had been separated.
María Chávez, a San Diego-based immigration legal professional, mentioned two of her shoppers opted to self-deport after being detained exterior the courthouse.
Folks have additionally been asking Chávez or different attorneys concerning the CBP Dwelling app and whether or not those that have used it are literally receiving the $1,000.
“For the individuals who are detained, it’s because they don’t want to be detained. They’re not criminals. They’ve never done anything bad or anything that would warrant them to be detained,” she mentioned.
Within the different instances she has heard about, she mentioned, “it’s more so about just being afraid of being caught and wanting to leave with their dignity intact,” she mentioned. “They want to be the ones to dictate how and when.”
Additionally, she mentioned, “There are people who are just leaving on their own and not even bothering to go through the app.”
Related efforts have been made by earlier administrations. In 2008, the federal authorities launched a “Scheduled Departure” pilot program in some U.S. cities, together with San Diego. This system in the end ended after failing to generate curiosity.
The chance to say goodbye
Two days earlier than Lázaro left, her church group on the Our Girl of Guadalupe parish in Logan Heights, the place she and her husband had been as soon as sacristans, took a second on the finish of a gathering to hug her and say heartfelt goodbyes. It was one thing they by no means had the prospect to do along with her husband.
Etelvina Lázaro, proper, hugs a fellow parishioner goodbye. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
Lázaro sat along with her head bowed in the midst of the room whereas these round her put their palms on her shoulders and wished her properly one final time.
“May she know that no matter where they are in the world, they will always be part of our community,” wished one of many parishioners. “May they never feel alone.”
“It’s sad to see someone who has been forced to leave,” mentioned Deacon Javier Mozo, who has recognized the household for years. “But at the same time, there is also joy because she is a woman willing to follow her husband wherever he goes. That speaks to the love between them … humans may try to divide them, but God will bring them back together in any situation.”
The evening after, at her San Diego condominium, she managed to suit a part of the life she had constructed within the U.S. through the years into three suitcases and two massive luggage.
Etelvina Lázaro in an virtually empty condominium with 20 years of packed belongings in a number of suitcases on Oct. 2. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
She glanced round yet another time. The household images that had as soon as adorned the partitions had been now in one of many luggage, frameless. Amongst them was a photograph of her and her husband on their marriage ceremony day. She additionally packed two hats that her husband didn’t have an opportunity to take with him.
“It was very hard to make this decision,” she mentioned, preventing again tears. “It hurts me because of my children. It hurts that we are going to be separated.”
Their lives modified the second she acquired a name from her husband letting her know that he had been arrested by federal brokers whereas on his option to his development job. Her husband, who had beforehand been deported in 2008, agreed to not combat his case and to be despatched again to Mexico.
Etelvina Lázaro rests her hand on a passport. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
Lázaro, who cleaned homes for a residing, mentioned that it didn’t take lengthy for her husband’s absence to take a toll on her.
“I’m not the same person I used to be,” she mentioned. “Sometimes I just want to go to bed and sleep. I don’t feel like doing anything.”
Her youngsters inspired her to go to Mexico to be with their father, assuring her that they’d maintain one another.
“It’s sad. It won’t be the same anymore,” mentioned her eldest son, José Peña. “I won’t be able to stop by and see my mom every day.”
On the similar time, Peña mentioned he believes it’s time for her to relaxation and spend time with their father.
Lázaro mentioned that she and her husband plan to finally transfer to Tijuana in order that their youngsters can go to them. Her husband plans to get again to work in development.
Father Scott Santarosa of Our Girl of Guadalupe parish blesses a bunch on Oct. 1. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
The Rev. Scott Santarosa of Our Girl of Guadalupe mentioned that the farewell gathering was supposed to supply closure, which is one thing that not many immigrant households have the chance to expertise.
“He disappeared,” he mentioned of Lázaro’s husband. “We couldn’t say goodbye, and it left a huge hole in our people and in our community.”
Rebuilding a life collectively
Lázaro reunited along with her husband within the rural city of San Francisco Uricho, Michoacán. They’re staying along with her mom, whom she had not seen in many years.
Etelvina Lázaro and her husband Margarito on their marriage ceremony day. (Ana Ramirez / The San Diego Union-Tribune)
In a telephone interview final week, she mentioned that the city of greater than 2,000 inhabitants has modified rather a lot since she and her husband left seeking a greater life. There are extra homes and folks. Nonetheless, she mentioned, many like her migrated to the U.S. through the years.
She acknowledged the disappointment she felt the evening she crossed the border again into Mexico after being away for a few years.
Per week later, after having had time to course of issues, she says she feels she will, at the least for now, adapt to residing in her previous city once more.
