Harriette Cole: The completely happy hour with my new co-workers was something however

DEAR HARRIETTE: I used to be at a contented hour for my firm’s end-of-year vacation get together, and since I just lately joined the group, I used to be trying ahead to attending to know everybody higher in a relaxed setting.

At first, I used to be having fun with myself and the whole lot was going effectively. Then one in all my colleagues began speaking about his political opinions, and the best way he spoke made me and the others within the group uncomfortable. It felt inappropriate to convey up at a piece occasion, particularly one meant to have fun the vacations and produce folks collectively.

I attempted to redirect the dialog, however he stored going and have become louder, too, which solely made the vitality within the group extra tense.

I barely know these colleagues, so I didn’t wish to trigger battle or appear impolite so early on in my time on the firm, however I additionally didn’t wish to stand there and faux I agreed with him. Afterward, I felt uncomfortable and apprehensive that this is likely to be a recurring problem with him.

I wish to construct good relationships with my group, but I’m uncertain the best way to set boundaries or deal with conditions like this going ahead.

How ought to I strategy him if any such conduct occurs once more, and will I convey it as much as anybody at work?

— Damaged Boundaries

DEAR BROKEN BOUNDARIES: You might be new to the corporate. Observe how the group members work together with one another. Take note of informal dialog so that you get a way of different folks’s views.

If you end up in a state of affairs the place simply the 2 of you’re collectively, it’s possible you’ll point out to him that you just thought issues obtained awkward when the dialog obtained political on the get together. You may counsel that it’s most likely finest to go away politics on the door at social features like that. He most likely gained’t agree with you, however you’ll have acknowledged your case.

Sooner or later, if he or anybody else begins mouthing off, you possibly can stroll away and refuse to interact. Or you possibly can ask the individual to vary the topic so that you’ve addressed it immediately.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a seasoned skilled with greater than 10 years of expertise, but I’ve been unemployed for over a 12 months now.

I’ve utilized to what looks like a whole bunch of roles, principally by LinkedIn or on-line portals, and it’s like my résumé retains disappearing right into a black gap. I do know the job market is hard, however I’m beginning to query my worth.

Folks inform me to “stay positive” and repeat affirmations, however positivity alone isn’t paying the payments — or boosting my confidence anymore.

I need 2026 to look totally different. I’m able to work, to contribute, to develop, however I’m exhausted from cold-applying to jobs that by no means even acknowledge my software.

What can I do to face out? How do I get observed by employers when the normal strategies aren’t working?

— Going Unnoticed

DEAR GOING UNNOTICED: There are such a lot of employment websites that promise excellent matches for potential candidates, and but many individuals complain that the expertise feels sterile, inhuman (which it might be, as many are AI-powered) and uncaring.

Whereas I don’t counsel that you just cease utilizing these sources altogether, I do suggest going the old style route: Put your self on the market. Go to networking occasions. Press the flesh.

Additionally — volunteer. Since you may have time, decide a charity or different group that wants assist, and supply your service. I can’t let you know what number of instances folks have discovered work after they volunteer.