DEAR HARRIETTE: One in every of my mates is newly engaged! I used to be over the moon for her once I heard that her associate had proposed.
The subsequent time I noticed her, I congratulated her and showered her with pleasure. She appeared coy and a bit reserved about it — it was nearly as if she was shocked that I knew, however I didn’t suppose a lot of it on the time.
It’s been a couple of months since her engagement, and I’ve observed some adjustments together with her.
We work collectively, and he or she has been arriving late fairly incessantly; all of her excuses about her lateness contain her associate. I don’t understand how he’s making her late or why she thinks that’s a sound motive, however I’m starting to fret.
She additionally appears reluctant about planning her wedding ceremony. I supplied to assist create one thing good and low-budget, however she requested me to cease planning. She’s been distant since then.
I texted her as soon as round 10 p.m. simply checking in and saying we should always catch up quickly, and her fiance texted me again from her telephone saying it’s too late for us to be texting. Isn’t that absurd? Is my pal in hassle?
— Crimson Flags
DEAR RED FLAGS: See if you may get her to go to lunch with you or take a stroll exterior throughout a break. Inform her straight that you’re nervous about her. Ask her if something is bothering her or if she wants assist.
Urge her to speak to somebody about no matter is happening — if not you, discover another person. Hand her a slip of paper with the Nationwide Home Violence Hotline on it: 1-800-799-7233.
Proceed to concentrate to what’s occurring, and make sure to be there for her when she wants you.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been relationship this man for a short while now, and we’ve actually hit it off.
On our final date, we have been out late, and he acquired a telephone name close to midnight. He appeared tense after the decision, and with out me asking, he instructed me it was his brother calling for some foolish recommendation.
On the finish of the night time, we went again to his place for the primary time. I went to make use of the toilet, and I heard him take one other telephone name. I attempted to take my time earlier than popping out in order to not interrupt what gave the impression of an intense dialog, however once I got here out, he hung up on whoever he was talking with. I requested if all the things was OK, and he mentioned sure, so I stayed.
We have been watching a film when he started receiving textual content messages on his display from a lady’s title. She was texting issues like, “Call me back” and “Where are you?” He didn’t acknowledge them, and I felt uncomfortable, so I instructed him I used to be going to move house.
He has not reached out to me since then. Ought to I ask him what that was all about?
— Suspicious Date
DEAR SUSPICIOUS DATE: This man clearly has unresolved points with another person that he’s not prepared to debate. Lower your losses and transfer on. If he does contact you once more, discover out if he has extricated himself from that relationship earlier than you determine to leap again in.
