DEAR ABBY: My youngest daughter will likely be getting married in three months. I’m 69 and have been a widower for six years.
I’ve been relationship a widow, “Rose,” who was a highschool good friend. We reconnected after our spouses handed away, after I ran into her at church whereas she was on the town caring for her mom. She is well-accepted by my household and mates.
Rose is worried about her function within the marriage ceremony. I’ve mentioned this together with her and indicated that her function is to be a visitor of the marriage couple in addition to my date for the night. I imagine that is acceptable and the fitting strategy to tackle this example.
I might respect any further feedback or solutions you might have.
— FATHER OF THE BRIDE IN MICHIGAN
DEAR FATHER: I collect out of your query that you could be be receiving some stress out of your girl good friend to take part within the marriage ceremony.
She could also be well-accepted by the household, but when your youngest daughter and her fiance needed Rose to be greater than a welcome visitor, they might have invited her to be a part of the bridal social gathering.
Inform Rose that she is your date, and her function is to attend, have a superb time with you and help the completely happy couple.
DEAR ABBY: My sister, whom I dearly love, goes by way of some tough occasions. She confides in me about her troubles, and I gladly hear and provides recommendation.
Though I’m keen to hear and assist, I really feel she would actually profit from seeing a therapist to assist her overcome a few of her challenges. I additionally know that her choices are hers to make, and I don’t need my views to get between us after I say one thing she might disagree with.
How can I like to recommend she get skilled assist with out it sounding like I’m pushing her away and discouraging her from sharing her emotions with me? After I talked about remedy a number of years in the past, she stated I needs to be her therapist. I informed her that was candy, however therapists have distinctive expertise that I don’t have.
My sister is on a really restricted revenue, and I’m not sure what it might value by way of her insurance coverage. She does really feel remedy is “good,” however has by no means really accomplished it.
She typically says she will be able to deal with these points on her personal, and I believe she’d be proof against counseling as a result of it might be like surrendering. Recommendation?
— HELPFUL SISTER IN COLORADO
DEAR SISTER: Inform your sister you’re keen on her, however you want to her to debate her points with a licensed psychotherapist as a result of, within the years she has been confiding in you, she hasn’t made progress. It’s the reality.
Level her within the route of her medical insurance firm, as a result of it could possibly present her with an inventory of authorised therapists. If that isn’t inexpensive, low-cost counseling could also be out there by way of the native division of psychological well being providers or from a university or college that has a division of psychology.
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
