DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ve a really shut good friend I’ve identified for a very long time. I take pleasure in seeing her and her husband. Nonetheless, every time we exit to dinner, she all the time tells me to make the restaurant reservation, as supposedly I do know all of the locations to go to.
As soon as we’re on the restaurant, she all the time complains in regards to the meals. Final time, there weren’t sufficient capers within the sauce and it had no taste. At a positive steak restaurant, she returned 4 objects: the espresso, the salad dressing, the steak that was undercooked (after which overcooked, when it got here again), and at last the ice cream!
We as soon as went to breakfast, and he or she returned scrambled eggs.
It’s so upsetting to me. I can perceive if one thing is really not good, however these are positive eating places and they’re simply doing their typical service. I really feel so horrible that she bothers the waiters by tasting 4 various kinds of wine and at last selecting one which she then doesn’t like.
GENTLE READER: Cease going to eating places along with her: “You have such discerning taste, and I don’t want you to suffer when the food is not up to your standards. Why don’t we go to a museum or for a walk instead?”
Miss Manners warns that you could be then need to take heed to her unsolicited critiques on artwork. And nature. However presumably, she will be unable to ship both of these again to the kitchen.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: For the final 12 years, I’ve labored as a member of a tight-knit workplace inside a a lot larger group. My co-workers have been right here even longer.
We all know one another nicely as a result of we have now to journey collectively usually, however don’t usually socialize exterior of labor (we’re collectively sufficient already!). I’ve been to some commencement events and a funeral, however typically don’t work together with my co-workers’ households a lot.
My oldest little one is getting married, and we’re finalizing the visitor checklist. I’m hesitating about who, if anybody, to ask from work. I feel my director would genuinely wish to attend, however am undecided in regards to the different venture supervisor, or my closest collaborator, whom I technically supervise.
Ought to I deal with this as an all-or-nothing state of affairs, like grade faculty birthday events? Ought to I think about the workplace energy dynamics when extending invites? Or ought to I simply assume most individuals assume weddings are annoying and never fear about it? I’m undecided what’s appropriate.
GENTLE READER: The rule is to ask anybody with whom you might be associates exterior of labor. And that sounds to Miss Manners like precisely nobody on this group, together with your enthusiastic director. Preserving it equitable shall be way more palatable, particularly in your colleagues.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Who typically walks the mom of the groom down the aisle?
GENTLE READER: Whichever groomsman is attempting to keep away from the bridesmaid he spent the earlier evening with will most likely volunteer.